I would kindly like to inform each and every of our faithful readers, and, more importantly, anyone who loves a good pair of nice, juicy titties, that my colleague and fellow writer Alex Hiatt has confided in me that he is plotting to desexualize said titties.
In the course of a discussion, Alex told me that he thought it to be absurd that a woman (with titties!) could be put in jail for revealing said titties in public. I told him, I says, "Alex, there's a real safety concern here, because if a guy who reallly reaaaaaaaaaally liked a good set 'a titties (and who doesnt?) was driving a car and saw a really nice pair of scrumptious titties, he'd get a really big boney and couldn't drive anymore." To which Alex responds, "Well, it would become commonplace."
This of course is an outrage:;: This would mean, we'd lose our precipitous, precipitous titties! We'd see some titties and think, boy, NOT VERY SEXUAL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH, ALEX HAIKU.!